After my discovery at my therapy session last week, I was surprised to find that the feeling of having that huge weight lifted from my shoulders had lasted.
I think I had grown so used to having those daily mental battles with myself, about myself, that when I realised that they weren’t happening, I was perplexed.
Did I like myself now? Was this just because I was having a few good days? Would the bitter inner voice return the minute something went wrong? I didn’t want to tempt fate and truly believe that I had finally started to get to grips with my self-esteem.
Soon enough, a bad day did come and the voice did too, but it was different; it was quieter and weaker, and I felt it had less power over me.
I was able to do the things I needed to do to make myself feel better, with a lot less resistance and I bounced back to my happy state much more quickly, feeling satisfied with how things were and even, dare I say, excited, about the direction I’m heading in.
I wanted to share some of the things I have found to help me get through any darker times. Unfortunately, there is no quick fix here and some things may have to be done consistently before you will see the benefits. But I am so glad I kept doing them because they make a huge difference to my mindset.
Yep, I’m going straight in with the big one. Without therapy, I 100% would not be in the headspace I am today.
I would probably still be drinking & eating too much, completely unaware that I was doing this to numb my emotions.
I would probably still be working for a company that destroys my mental health and I am pretty sure that a lot of my relationships would be diminished as I spiralled out of control.
And worst of all, I would have accepted all of this, because I was not self-aware and had no idea about what was really going on in my own body and mind.
Don’t get me wrong, it’s not an easy ride. It may take a while for you to find the right one and you will need to be prepared to be open and honest about pretty much everything, but the things you learn about yourself, the difference it can make to your life far outweigh any obstacle, in my opinion.