Anxious August: A Month of Low Moods and Bright Spots

Last week I shared my June & July reflections and now we are in September I thought I would catch you up.

When I started my notes for this post, I was still in Turkey, and the feelings of hope were yet to find me. My notes began with me being pissed off because a complete stranger, a man, had the audacity to make my uterus his business.

Whilst minding my own business on the beach one morning, the hotel photographer was doing the rounds and decided to chat to me. He asked who I was on holiday with and I told him my husband and stepsons and he went into quite a lengthy speech about how it wasn’t too late for me to have children of my own.

This man, who I didn’t know from Adam, thought it was perfectly ok to tell me what to do with my body. I was so flabbergasted that I didn’t even have the words to respond to him. Which, if you’re wondering, would have been “F*CK OFF.”

Being in my perimenopause has not, as I thought it would, stopped people from speaking about my decision not to have children 🤷🏻‍♀️

I was having my second lymphatic drainage massage of the week later that day, and the tension must have gotten to me because this one, unlike the first, involved the masseuse cracking my neck and back, which I have to say felt good.

Being on holiday always gives me lots of space to think, but the anxiety still lingered; I couldn’t relax, and when it was time to go home, I was ready. I felt ashamed…